Parenting

My ‘Guest Room’ Apology

My ‘Guest Room’ Apology
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I’m part of a few ‘Mommy Groups’ over on Facebook, and occassionally I come across some amazing posts. The following post as an open letter to a dear friend about her guest room was shared in the Bringing Up the Littles by Allison Wilson Wright; and she gave me permission to share it with you. She captures the changes in friendship and life that having children can have, and I love her way with words and the delicate story she shares.

The Guest Room

To my out-of-town dearest friend who is coming to spend the weekend with me tomorrow…let me start out by saying, I know it’s been a long time since we last “hung out.” When you moved away, my child was still a newborn. A lot has changed since then! (I now have an active 2.5 year old!)

So in regards to housekeeping, I feel as if I should apologize. My house is a shadow of its former glory. It’s no longer quite as grand and stately in its internal appearance. Finery that was once proudly on display, has long since been tucked into a closet, hidden away until the day that delightful and curious hands no longer investigate their delicate natures.

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I apologize for the dirty handprints on the door and windows. It’s a struggle. I apologize for the massive pile of toys in the corner of the living room. It grows ever larger and is rarely tamed to that corner. (Just stay awhile and you will see the room explode into it’s true toy glory…compliments of my toddler.)

I’m sorry that the toilet has a child’s potty seat on it. It stays there permanently to prevent would be accidents if I needed to fumble for it. I’m sorry that the shower has bath toys littering the bottom of the tub. I picked them up and put them in a basket but I’m pretty sure the crash I heard earlier was my toddler re-dumping them out. I meant to pick them up but I got busy. I’m sorry that the potty room’s reading material has changed from Cosmopolitan magazine to chunky, hard-back books such as “When the Elephant Walks” and “Goodnight Moon.”

I apologize that there are crumbs in the floor. I sweep and vacuum daily but I didn’t get a chance to mop. Please don’t judge me. I do try my best but most days attempting to conquer the battle of the crumbs is a lesson in futility.

I also sincerely apologize that when we take my car to the pumpkin farm in the morning, that you will see the state of my car. Good heavens is it embarrassing! I did manage to take all the trash out but it’s needs to be vacuumed something terrible. There are toys, toddler shoes, dried out, stale French fries and goldfish crackers littering the floor board. Gah! Please don’t be too harsh in your silent judgment. Finding time to detail my car isn’t high on my priority list these days.

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Again, I apologize for the state of my house. I try my best to keep it clean and tidy but it’s a far cry from it’s prior days. However, there is one room in which you will find no apology. The room you will be sleeping in,
The Guest Room was converted into our nursery. It used to be painted in rich earthy tones. The Guest Room housed a queen sized bed with a gorgeous bedspread and matching window treatments. All the comforts a guest needed to feel at home were within easy reach. But The Guest Room you used to admire as “such a lovely place” held a sad secret.

The NurseryThe Guest Room’s door, when not in use was firmly shut to block out the painful reminder of what the room’s true purpose should be for. The stillness of the room was like a tomb. It tugged at my heart and reminded me of the emptiness of my womb. The daily ache of its emptiness was always there like a toothache, never forgotten but I still needed no visual reminder of what wasn’t to be.

Fast forward nearly three years and The Room now holds so much life! Walls painted a bright and cheerful color! Toys and stuffed animals line up in all their glory around bed. The Room’s closet burst with clothes and shoes and even more toys! The Room once silent is silent no more. If you stand outside the door and listen you will hear shrieks of laughter, imagination and silliness. The Room no longer sits and waits to accommodate a potential guest. It now houses life and love on a daily basis! The Room belongs to the sunshine of my life, my happiness and my joy! And for that I simply can’t and won’t apologize! (But please make yourself as comfortable as possible despite.)

Thank you again Allison, this really struck a chord within me, and I am proud to host it here.

Emma

A Military Spouse stationed in the middle of nowhere. Emma loves to cook for her family (while dodging dirty dishes). She is blessed to be a stay at home mom with 3 kiddos. She is passionate about cloth diapering, car seat safety, breastfeeding, homeschooling, frugal living, babywearing, and her Christian faith. More Molly Messy than Susie Homemaker, she has been trying to improve her housekeeping and related skills.

7 thoughts on “My ‘Guest Room’ Apology

  1. what a precious post, sharing your heart and yet unwilling to apologize for that little one you so desired. I have a daughter that is struggling to have a baby as well she is trying really hard. to have a baby of her own. While we may have hand prints and the house may not all be clean we will not worry about it when we have that little baby.

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  2. Such a beautiful open letter. So honestly she has opened her heart and apologized for the house, yet not for the room which now houses the most precious part of her life 🙂 I guess all our houses are exactly in that state she mentions, after having an active toddler
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  3. Beautiful open letter. I don’t have kids myself but I have friends who do and whenever I visit they are like sorry for this or that but they shouldn’t! Kids are wonderful but demanding at the same time and being a mom is bliss but not easy. For moms all over – enjoy your kids and do more of what makes you happy. You will not remember how untidy a room was a year from now, but the experiences with the loved ones.
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  4. Oh man!!! I can relate with
    This so much!! I have 4 kiddos but there are 9 years and then 6 years between my
    Oldest three so there were always helpers and life was pretty
    Mellow. Then I had my last little guy 21 months later and having a baby
    And toddler has
    Created an explosion of chaos that I feel like I’m constantly doing damage control for but never quite on top of!!! Great letter 🙂 I wonder how her friend reacted??

    Reply

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